


Fascination

by TriplePirouette



Series: Allure and Fascination [2]
Category: CSI: Crime Scene Investigation
Genre: F/M, UST
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2003-07-08
Updated: 2003-07-08
Packaged: 2017-10-29 21:08:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 851
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/324198
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TriplePirouette/pseuds/TriplePirouette
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Why Gil loves Sara. Grissom POV. Sequel to "Allure"</p>
            </blockquote>





	Fascination

**Author's Note:**

> Originally Posted 7/8/03 - no edits have been made since then.
> 
> This is a companion/sequel to "Allure." Niff wanted to know what Grissom thought about Sara, and I guess it is only fair if she gets to ogle him, he gets to got he same. So this is for NIFF! Yay!

 

Throughout my life I've found myself fascinated by many things: baseball, forensic science, experimentation, puzzles of all kinds, but never before have I found myself fascinated by something where I couldn't pick it apart and find out how it works to ease my curious mind.

I'd also never been fascinated by a person before. Their behavior, yes, but a person, no.

Her entire being fascinates me.

Sara Sidle is a mystery that I want to dive into head first and figure out, from every angle, every molecule, every smile. The more I slowly learn about her, the more I know that it would take a lifetime to unravel her like I want to.

As a CSI and as a coroner I know how the human body works, I know how the human mind works. Every day I put together puzzles that require me to map out every physical move to explain the how, and every mental thought to explain the why. I deal with the brilliant minds of my CSIs and the demented minds of hardened criminals.

I can do all this, but I still can't figure her out. She's the wild card, ruled by duty and honor and an emotional roller coaster that makes her beautifully unpredictable. So I study her.

Like any good study, the subject doesn't know she's being watched. At least, I hope she doesn't know. If she does, she's not saying anything.

Physically, she's easy to dissect. The fact that she has no restrictions on the job tells me she's as close to perfect health as any of us can be. Under her skin she would have the same bones and muscles and organs that any of us do. She's tall, and probably slightly too thin for her height. Might run in the family, but I don't know; I've never had an occasion to meet her family. Her smile reveals a small gap between her front teeth that gives it character. Maybe she had braces when she was a kid and never wore her retainers? Maybe she just has remarkably straight teeth...

Her appearance otherwise shows that she cares what she looks like, but not that she cares what others think of her. She's always comfortable in what she wears, it's always professional and stylish. Even when there's a little too much skin showing here or there, she never flaunts it, never used her sexuality as a weapon. She's comfortable with who she is.

She's a smart creature, too. I know that one day her intellect and knowledge is bound to pass my own, and the student will become the teacher. She soaks up knowledge, and has practically an eidetic memory. And it's not just her ability to regurgitate information that makes her smart. She thinks, she extrapolates, she investigates, and she's just as street smart as she is book smart. Sometimes I wonder if she's telepathic, too. Her ability to know what I'm thinking when it comes to crime scenes is uncanny.

Her intellect, however, is often overshadowed by emotion. She follows the evidence until it leads her to the conclusion: the truth. But her need for justice is so overpowering, so all encompassing, that she will put everything on the line to attain it. It makes her stupid, really. Whatever it is in her that craves this keeps her from thinking, from making rational decisions. That scares me. It scares all of us. Her ability to get lost in her work is beautiful and tragic at the same time.

Her eyes are always telling. She can disguise her body language, her words, even her voice sometimes. But her eyes will always tell me what's going on in her head. Most often, frighteningly often, it's pain and empathy. There's something in there that I wish she would share, something that makes her identify with female victims more and more. It's the one thing that makes her a great CSI, and the one thing that will destroy her career, that will destroy her, if she's not careful.

Sara's kind of like Hamlet: a flawed, tragic figure filled with beauty and emotion whose antic disposition has all of us wondering. No one truly knows her well enough to tell where she will be or what she will do, to know what's the act and what's the truth.

She has a wit sharp enough to make fun of someone and have them think they've just received a compliment.

She is dedicated to a fault, putting others over herself in such a show of responsibility that no one will ever question her fidelity.

She is beautiful in an understated way, simplicity at its best.

She is simply a fascinating being. Mind, body, and soul she is the most wonderful enigma that I've ever come across. I study her silently, waiting for the day when I know enough about her to approach her, to be able to be everything she needs. But until I can understand what it is she needs, I will study her, mentally noting my observations, and creating a secret study on my favorite fascination: Sara Sidle.


End file.
